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10 Tips to Prepare for Your First IEP Meeting
The prospect of attending an IEP meeting can be very daunting, especially if it is your first one. This meeting to determine an Individual Education Plan for your child will help shape their future, and you have a big say in how it goes. So, it is important to prepare for these special education meetings as best you can. Here are 10 tips for parents of kids with autism when preparing for IEP meetings.
1) Set Up The Meeting.
The first step is pretty straightforward and essential, but one where you can begin to gain the upper hand and a sense of control. There will be a request for a meeting, which you need to agree to. In doing so, you can request a date and time that works best with your schedule and that of anyone else involved in the meeting. It is a great first step for making the system work in your favor. The more convenient the time and date, the less stressful the day should be.
2. Determine the Guest List
There is a list of people expected to take part in an IEP meeting for the best result. A parent/guardian is a must, and your partner may choose to be there too. Then there are the teaching staff and other professionals from the education sector. This includes a general education teacher, probably your child’s teacher, a special education teacher, a representative from the LEA, and maybe other support staff.
However, you are entitled to invite advocates and/or a case manager to support you as needed. This could be an autism support worker from outside the education system or a family friend with a close connection to your child. Either can help back you up when making suggestions and pushing for a new approach. It is also possible to bring your child to the meeting if you feel they are old enough and able to handle it.
3. Gather as Much Information as Possible.
It helps to have all the necessary information to hand. The more you have available, the better your case. An IEP binder is a great way to collect important documentation, such as details of your current IEP if applicable. You can also take progress reports, report cards, homework samples, tests, teacher notes, and anything else that could help support your claims. If in doubt, take it. It’s better to have too much than not enough.
4. Spend Time Discussing The Meeting With Your Child.
Whether your child is going to be a part of the meeting or not, it is still a good idea to discuss the upcoming session with them in advance. If they are taking part, this session can help them prepare for what to expect from the meeting, and help them with any concerns or anxieties. If they aren’t going, you can still learn a lot about their concerns and experiences of special education schools and use that when presenting your case.
5. Have a Dedicated IEP Notebook
There are two benefits to getting a notebook for your child’s IEP. The first is that you can prepare notes in advance of the meeting and have them beside you. Write down everything you want to say, including any concerns you have about your child and their needs. Write down things like where your child is thriving and struggling, what areas need work and anything you don’t understand. This way, you won’t forget them when caught up in the emotion and questioning at the meeting.
You can also use the book to ask questions where needed and write down the answers. Don’t be ashamed if you don’t know something. All parent’s have been in that position and deserve transparency and compassion. Also, remember that a recording device is generally permitted if you prefer the idea of recording the session for future reference. Ask in advance to clarify the rules.
6. Consider Taking Water and/or Snacks
When packing your bag for the big IEP meeting, don’t forget some snacks and water. The trend has been for shorter meetings, but initial eligibility meetings can still run long (especially if the Team is not in agreement). This could be a long session, with some lasting a couple of hours or more. You don’t want to be dealing with a dry throat or ending the meeting before you’re done because you’re hungry/thirsty. As simple as it sounds, a light snack could help you through.
7. Think About How you Want to Dress for the Meeting
This is something to take a little time to think over the night before the meeting. While not important to everyone, we’ve heard a lot of parents say the right outfit gives them the confidence to present themselves well. Schools are not intentionally creating a stressful situation for parents; however IEP meetings can be intimidating and doing everything you can to feel prepared and confident can help calm your nerves. The right outfit is a simple thing you can do to can make a positive impression. The smarter and more professional you look, the better the chance of the education professionals taking your concerns seriously. The same goes for any advocates that come with you. Show them you are serious about getting a good result and mean business.
8. Prepare a Positive Mindset
A positive mindset is essential to get through these IEP meetings and any subsequent meetings with the school. There is always going to be some level of anxiety walking into a meeting with the school because you want the very best for your child. Try and stay as optimistic as possible with the knowledge that you know what is best for your child. For the vast majority of meetings, schools and parents see eye to eye, but it is not impossible you will have to calmly present a different viewpoint or ask for services the school is not considering. Stay calm and positive and walk into the meeting expecting it to go well. IF things do not go as expected, listen and consider what the school Team is saying, but know that you do not have to finalize a plan at the first meeting.
9. Expect it to be Mentally and Emotionally Draining
At the same time, you need to be realistic and can’t assume that these meetings will be a breeze without any bumps in the road. Even a gentle and positive meeting can be draining because you are talking about the welfare and future of your child. We can’t think of a topic to be more emotional about than getting help for your child. Even when the Team is in agreement, you can get passionate (and you might even get tearful) when talking about your child’s needs. If you expect it, it won’t creep up on you so badly.
10. Remember Your Rights From Beginning to End
Finally, remember that you don’t have to sign anything then and there. It is a good idea to take the time to go over what you have heard with others, such as your partner and child, and process the session. Talk to experts about the proposal before making a final call. If needed, the Team can be reconvened to further discuss any rejected portions of the IEP. If you have questions about the IEP or don’t understand portions of it, reach out to the Team Liaison for explanations. Never forget that you are a vital part of your child’s IEP Team.
No IEP meeting for kids with autism will ever be easy or fun, no matter how many you take part in. But, with these 10 tips for preparing for an IEP meeting, you can stay in control and reduce the burden. Prepare your binder, guests, questions, wardrobe, and mindset for a much better experience.
